Then what does Ephesians 5:22-24 mean?

These new Christians wanted to understand who Jesus was. While explaining how Christ was the head of the church, and thus the head of the new Christians, Paul said in effect “the best way I can think of is to compare it to your marriage.” That is clear in Ephesians 5:32 when Paul says “This is a profound mystery, but I am talking about Christ and the church,” meaning that instead of it actually being a human marriage he is referring to, it is the relationship that Christ has with the church that he is talking about. That is a far cry from Paul making a human marriage the focus.

Then Paul says that even though he is talking about the church, their marriages are important too. “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” The Common English Bible translates it this way, “Marriage is a significant allegory, and I’m applying it to Christ and the church. In any case, as for you individually, each one of you should love his wife as himself, and wives should respect their husbands.”

Is the husband the head of the wife like Christ is head of the church?

However, some will still say “I believe that the husband is the head of the wife like Christ is the head of the church.” Paul says exactly that in Ephesians 5:23. We do not know what Paul or the translators meant when they said those words. We do know that Jesus’ sacrificial death and resurrection made him head of the church. Complementarian husbands become heads of their wives at their wedding ceremonies with comparatively little sacrifice. The two are so dissimilar, with Christ giving his life while a husband obtains a wife, that it appears sacrilegious to make that comparison.

 It is more probable that Paul meant for the Ephesians to look at their own families where the husbands were already the heads, and then think of Jesus as being the head of his church family. To compare Jesus and husbands culturally in the First Century is no problem, but to make a biblical commandment for 21st century husbands to be in authority over their wives promotes men to the god-head.

Traditionally interpreted, those words create a contradiction in what Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 11:3, “Now I want you to realize the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God,” because Paul told the Ephesians that Christ is head of the church which is comprised of both men and women, whereas he told the Corinthians that Christ is the head of men only. But we know that Christ is the head of female Christians, too.

Jesus himself answers the question

The answer is found in the Gospels. Jesus affirmed that he was the head of women both before and after his death. He left women no room for doubt. Think back to Mary of Bethany who he allowed to sit at his feet and learn from the Master himself. Then remember the Gentile woman to whom Jesus revealed that he was to be the savior not only to the Jews, but to all people, which included her. Read again how Jesus revealed to the Samaritan woman that he was the Messiah. And finally, stand before the tomb where Jesus, in his resurrected body, made himself known to Mary before he told any man that he was alive. Jesus himself was telling women that he alone is their head, and there is no middle man between them.

These are powerful events that cannot be discounted. Jesus’ ascension into heaven did not change those truths. Women are as important to our Lord on this side of the cross as they were on the other side.

Headship has no place in the Gospels. Jesus said, “You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be the first must be slave of all, for even the Son of man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:42b-45).

Jesus did not say that men were heads of their wives, and he did not indicate that men would be elevated to headship after his resurrection. Since Jesus did not bind women before his resurrection to their husbands, there is no reason to believe that Jesus would bind women to their husbands after his resurrection.

See Shirley Taylor in Baptizing Feminism Documentary Trailer.

Books by Shirley Taylor available in Print and Kindle on Amazon

The Biblical Marriage Myth: The Devil Comes Calling
The Power of a Book: The Street Evangelist
From Wife to Widow: What I know Now
Beyond the Grave: A Christian Dilemma
Raising the Hood: A Christian Look at Manhood and Womanhood
Women Equal – No Buts: Powered by the same Source
Dethroning Male Headship: 2nd Edition